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A Cry Out

This Mother’s Day, I say to all women “YOU. ARE. BEAUTIFUL. You are appreciated, treasured, incredible, worthy, valuable, predcious and priceless. No matter where you are in your mothering, nurturing. I absolutely love the beauty of women, and love to see the nurturing that is simply hardwired into us. Whether we’ve borne any children or not.  To watch how women caretake and nurture the hearts and dreams of others, cheering for victories, praying and believing for breakthrough for those around us. It’s simply stunning to sit back and really soak in the Mother’s heart of women.

Every woman’s journey is beautiful and painful. My heart breaks for unfulfilled dreams; for arms and hearts that ache to nurture your own people. A baby, a husband. My heart greives with the Mama’s whose babies are in heaven- that have been aborted, miscarried, my own included. For the Mama that today is a painful day because they have a child in heaven that died before them. Wayward children, agony over adequacy as a mother, prayers for safety, watching children go off with their dad, shame and regrets that can consume us and overtake us if we let them. For some women, the pain lies in a broken, difficult relationship with their own Mama.. its difficult to celebrate someone who has caused or continues to damage.

There are glorious redemption stories all around amidst the pain, and for that I’m so grateful. Finding smiles amidst the tears, I see women stand and stand again. To pick the hope back up, pull the covers off her head and face life yet another day. To find the beautiful among the mess, and reach out and nurture yet again. To rise again in courage, strength, and dignity.

Every Mama can tell stories of our children that will split our sides with laughter, drop our jaws in disbelief, wonder how any child ever survives, and yes, even think, “Wow, I’m an awesome Mom.” (Admit it… I think we’ve all thought that). My own have climbed to places they shouldn’t be, usually naked, peed off of playground equipment with a parkful, prompted me to call the police in their excellent hiding.

 Everything has been wrecking my heart lately. My own personal struggle of what usually feels like survival in raising 3 kids alone; hoping for the dreams I hold in my heart…, walking alongside so many with broken hearts and painful journeys, smelling the flowering trees as I walk, breathing in incredible views and the tiniest details of creation. Watching my kids take joy in life. Loving and being loved. It all overwhelms me to my knees in a puddle of my own tears.

My current favorite song right now is Jared Anderson’s “God Be in My Head,” and it leaves me undone when I listen to it. It’s a cry and prayer for God to be in our everything…. head, thinking, understanding and looking, desires, reaching and seeking, prayers, heart and speaking, our life, our wanderings. To be all consuming. In listening to it, I realize how much I pick my pain back up and forget the glorious God that loves me and my children. How he cares about our dreams, has answers to our heartbreaks and pain. Delights when we seek him, include and thank him, and pour out his love for us onto others. How quickly I forget in my own selfishness.

So today, whatever your story, man or woman, Mama or not, will you join me in letting God be in our everything? Could you let him saturate and permeate your life somehow, to reveal a glory story and give us perspective in this life that can only come straight from the heart of God?

Happy Mother’s Day!

 

heres a link to Jared Anderson’s Song… “God Be in My Head”

 

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About Erika Chowning

God-crazy, and sometimes just a bit crazy, I'm in awe of the beauty and glory this life offers. I am a Masters Level Practictioner of Splankna Therapy, which is a mind-body-spirit therapy model. I'm a currently single mama to three beautiful souls, and I love to be in the middle of God's creation, adventuring and exploring, laughing, dancing, playing and whatever else fun I can find. I'm a believer that life is rich when we become aware of the little moments placed before us and embrace them fully-the joy, sorrow, beauty, love and pain. Life is so short to be too serious, but there is so much devastating brokenness all around us that feels crushing. My writing is about a journey into wholeness and restoration. For me, you and those around us. So won't you join me in diving into our experiences and hearts? Feel free to share a thought or many, and please, please, love those you're with.

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